#auspol On Bill Heffernan’s total non-hoax with a totally fake bomb

SCENE

INTERIOR, SMALL PLAIN MEETING ROOM IN AUST PARLIAMENT HOUSE; SECURITY STAFF ARE ALL IN THOSE SHITTY BROWN MOULDED PLASTIC SCHOOL CHAIRS; ENTER SECURITY BOSS WITH CLIPBOARD AND IMPRESSIVE MOUSTACHE

BOSS
Thanks for coming everyone – I’m sure you’re aware of the need for this emergency meeting on P-House security procedures, so I’ll skip the usual business and go straight the motions tabled. Motion 1: that we keep that embarrassing unhinged geriatric liability Bill Heffernan the fuck away from this place forever, until he dies, or at least implement the requirement that he be wheeled around on a sack-truck like Hannibal Lecter and fed with a straw.

SECURITY STAFF
(in perfect unison)
FUCKING SECONDED!

_FIN_

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